Requested: Advice On My Relationship
posted on 11/02/2009
im 16 ive been with my boyfriend for a little over a year and im not sure if i should stay with him. i feel like we used to have fun together all the time, we would go out together, talk to eachother alot, and just enjoy eachothers company. now it feels like when ever we hang out we fight about stupid stuff. we had a fight today and i brought all this up and we havnt talked since. i love him and i feel like i need him in my life but something needs to change because im not happy like i used to be. i dont know if im just bored or if maybe we really should break up. its really tearing me apart. : ( help please?
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here4u_dude says:
(18d 16h 41min ago)
Some relationships aren't ment to be forever. Its possible that the one you're in has run its course. It isn't neccisarily anyone's fault. Sometimes it's just the way it turns out.
Having been with him for as long as you have will make it more difficult to move on because you've gotten used to having him around. It's not easy to change from something familiar. But this may be a good time to turn to friends and family for support. They can help you get through the toughest part.
Asking yourself if you're bored and missing "the way things used to be" are indicators that the relationship is in trouble...especially if no amount of working at it changes anything. You feel like you still love him, and you still very well may love him, but you may be IN love with the idea of who you thought he was when you met and what you used to have together. Its hard to let go of romantic ideas like that and accept the fact that it's going to change. But some soul searching should help you distinguish the two.
With all this in mind, the best thing to do is talk with him and find out how he feels. Above all, honesty is the most important thing. Afterwards, if it seems like there is hope, then there could be if both of you are willing to put forth the effort. But if even one of you are not willing or denys that there are problems, then its time to let go.
I hope this helps and I wish you the best of luck!